Just another crazy adult fic I kicked out. placed here because of extreme language. ATR stands for According to Tera's Reckoning. I just needed a few dates.
this is a story about a plucky little bitchin' babe known as Xilingshi Zoraki. She's basically the most awesome thing that ever happened t Air Nomads anywhere.
anyhoot, story time.
THE EASTERN AIR TEMPLE 2105 years after Ozai’s downfall, [year 2105 ATR] The Eastern Air Temple, like the other three, was in some seriously deep shit. The Avatar Guard Army had invaded them in 2102 ATR, but in by spring of 2105 ATR they declared war and immediately proceeded to fucking annihilate everything they came across, turning the poorly-trained and under-equipped Air Nomads into target practice and conquering anything that happened to pass into their line-of-sight. It was in the midst of what was turning out to be one of the most epic ass-beatings in the history of avatar warfare that the insane actions of a single group of heroes under the command of Lieutenant Xilingshi Nailah Zoraki found a way to inspire badassitude in their fellow nomads and give the Avatar Guard invasion forces a giant swinging cock-slap right in their collective faces.
As I mentioned like two sentences ago, the Air Nomads had spent roughly two months getting their faces rocked off by the unstoppable juggernaut that was the Avatar Guard war machine as it tore through the four temples crushing asses like Grave Digger. It wasn’t until the 5th month of 2105, after the Southern, Northern and most of the Western Air Temples had been turned into sand for the Avatar Guard’s cats’ litterboxes, that the Air Nomads finally located their balls and decided to make a stand and defend the critical region of the Eastern Air Temple from the invaders, mostly due to the bison herds that were there. Through several weeks of hardcore bitter fighting that turned the majority of the Air Temples into a raging inferno of suck, the relentless Avatar assault busted through the Air Nomad lines like the Kool-Aid Man, capturing several crucial areas and putting the Air Nomads in an indefensible position in the city. Knowing that they were fucked worse than an over-the-hill porn star, the Head Air Monks and Sisters ordered a complete withdrawal of all surviving nomads still positioned in the Eastern Air Temple, flying bison included. Only a small element of the badass 2nd Air Nomad military division would be left behind to cover the retreat and slow down the Avatar’s Army so as many people could be evacuated as possible.
Now, keep in mind that there were only about 13 “divisions” of Air Nomad military, and these were mostly just self-trained Air Nomad warriors who had decided to give the finger to the peaceful Air Nomad lifestyle and live a life of face-stamping carnage and bloodshed and fight for their country with no regard for the value of life.
Lieutenant Xilingshi ordered her battalion to fall back to the large, well-equipped multi-story 3rd temple that had been serving as Division HQ during the Battle of the Eastern Air Temple. The area was stocked with equipment and supplies and was backed up against the river, and since the other side of the river was a Water Tribe-controlled Neutral Zone, Xilingshi knew that she would only have to worry about defending the Eastern Air Temple from attacks on three sides. As her warriors began to trickle in, she ordered all the walls and windows reinforced with sandbags, she strategically positioned her benders throughout the structure, and she scoured the nearby other temples for whatever food, medical supplies and ammunition that her warriors could carry. She cleared out any nearby structures that the Avatar Guard soldiers could have used for cover, setting up choke points and kill zones wherever she could. The fortifications that could not be demolished were rigged with explosives and hilarious whoopee cushions. After all, having been trained by ninjas and given powers by God himself, Xilingshi and many other Air Nomads were well-trained in the art of Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom-style explosive devices built for manslaughter. Xilingshi, with the help of some Water Tribe badasses like Tenoko Dragmire, Katara Altina II, and Koara Lombardi, put the ‘laughter’ back in ‘manslaughter’ as they perfected these devices.
Sometime during the 9th month, the Avatar Guard moved into the areas surrounding the temple and began their attempts to capture the stronghold. Hardcore balls-out fighting had already reduced Xi’s 800-man battalion down to around 475 warriors, but only 431 soldiers had actually made their way to the temple by the time the shit hit the fan for serious. Her outfit was a mixture of grizzled old veterans weary from three months of near-constant fighting, and green, inexperienced recruits who could barely tell the difference between the arm and the ammunition of a catapult. She had no heavy weapons, no anti-siege equipment, no anti-airship specialists, and no reinforcements, and now she was locked in a shitty temple, completely fucking surrounded by the elite Avatar Guard 45th Division – twenty thousand soldiers with artillery, mortars and more armored tanks and siege weapons than an 8-player game of Age of Empires II with no population limit.
The Avatar Guard immediately went on a full-on charge, eager to take the last bastion of Air Nomad control in the region and reduce it to firewood, but as they tried to approach the building they ran into a wall of fucking Air Nomad attacks, many of which managed to infect the enemy with severe cases of death. This came to a surprise to them, as they had very few airbenders with them, and they did not know the lethality of 250-mile-an-hour winds or sharp spleen-squelching blades of death that Xi’s warriors were notorious for using. Ever seen an Air Nomad make an air spear? You don’t wanna. At one point the Avatar Guard managed to set fire to the temple’s explosive stores, but luckily Xi’s airbenders were able to get the blaze extinguished before the gunpowder caught fire and turned the temple into a goddamned space shuttle. During the night the Air Nomads rebuilt their fortifications, and Xi attempted to rally her troops’ morale in the face of a grim situation. On the awesome side, the Water Tribe troops across the river took an interest in the shitstorm that was going down at the temple and snuck over during the night to give the Air Nomad troops some extra supplies and evacuate wounded nomads.
The next day the Avatar Guard continued pouring fire into the building, but after several massive assaults they were still unable to penetrate Xilingshi’s defenses. At this point the citizens of the Eastern Air Temple were digging the fighting spirit of the 2nd Air Nomad Division and the banks of the Water Tribe side of the river became crowded with spectators cheering on the defenders. They shouted encouragement to the men, sang pump-up music, smuggled materials and supplies into the fortress and even went so far as to write out Avatar Guard troop movements on giant posters (some of the Earth Kingdomers used giant stone slabs) so Xilingshi could see what the fuck was going on. I picture the scene kind of like looking like the crowd at WWE Raw or some shit. During the night, a large Air Nomad National Flag was brought to the defenders, and when dawn came up the next morning it was flying proudly above the temple, serving as an inspiration to the denizens of the war-torn city and getting everyone who saw it super psyched up to kick some Avatar Guard ass.
Now this really pissed off the Avatar Guard 45th Division, and they spent the next three days and nights fucking incessantly pummeling the shit out of the temple with everything from mortars to artillery to giant goat-launching catapults. As Xi had predicted, the enemy commanders didn’t dare attack the temple with very many air or naval bombardments out of fear of hitting the Water Tribe concessions (and bringing the wrath of the Almighty Katara Altina II on the Avatar Guard), but pretty much anything else the Avatar Guard could get their hands on was launched at the stronghold in a never-ending barrage of explosives, grenades, explosives, rocks, explosives, water, explosives, fire, explosives, ninja stars, explosives, and paper footballs. Endless waves of warriors, catapults and tanks charged the defensive positions, and the Avatar Guard were even able to break through into the temple and scale the structure’s walls a couple of times, but brutal hand-to-hand fighting proved that the Air Nomad Kung Fu was superior and the 45th Division was kept at bay. Xilingshi herself was mentioned as getting in on the action and choking some dude to death with her bare hands in the time that she wasn’t surveying the situation, encouraging her warriors, or firing her own attacks at the onrushing hordes. At night, the Avatar guard would make fiery columns to cover their troop movements and blind the Air Nomad defenders, and they even once tried to earthbend a tunnel underneath the building, but nothing was successful. The Eastern Air Temple was locked up tighter than a fucking Catholic School prom date.
Finally, after four days of constant fighting, and with the evacuation of the Easter Air Nomad regions nearly complete, Xilingshi was ordered to fall back and retreat to the Water Tribe concession on the morning of the 10th month. Originally she refused, saying she would fight the Avatar Guard to the last man, but her superiors, including Katara II, managed to convince her that getting her entire command killed for no reason didn’t really make a whole lot of sense so she began to make arrangements for the withdrawal. Twenty-seven of her warriors were too fucked up to evacuate, so Xilingshi set them up with heavy catapults and explosive devices and had them provide covering fire while the 404 survivors limped across the bridge to safety. They were then taken to the Southern Water Tribe for awesomeness reasons, and recovery.
Xilingshi had become a national hero overnight, and during her entire tenure in the Water Tribe people from across the world—Water Tribe, Earth Kingdom, and Fire Nation alike, would flock to meet her. When this motherfucking hardass finally decided that she had been evading death too long, she met up with Death and ordered several rounds of beer for the both of them, before beating him at a poker game and heading on to the next life. Her funeral was attended by over two hundred thousand mourners.
Xilingshi Nailah Zoraki is fucking badass as shit for taking a handful of inexperienced Air Nomads and turning them into a fighting force capable of holding back the advance of tens of thousands of enemy Water Tribe, Earth Kingdom, and Fire Nation soldiers, covering the retreat of the bulk of the Air Nomads, and greatly contributing to the safe evacuation of several thousand civilians from the Air Temples. Considering that the Avatar Guard slaughtered over ten thousand civilians after they captured the other three Air Temples Xilingshi’s actions probably saved many innocent lives as well. Her valiant stand also served to bolster the fighting spirit of the resistance movement, proving to the Air Nomads that the Avatar Guard was not invincible, and it also proved to the Water Tribe of all people that the Air Nomads were willing to fight for their country, despite their supposed value of life—a realization that would lead to a great deal of financial and military aid to the Air Nomads. To this day, the story of the “800 Heroes” (Xilingshi was feeding a campaign of misinformation and consistently reported the size of his force at 800 to make the Avatar Guard believe that they were facing a much larger force) is a national legend among the people of the Air Nomads, Fire Nation, Water Tribe and Earth Kingdom, and Xilingshi Nailah Zoraki is remembered by ally and enemy alike as being a total badass.
Last edited by Tera253 on Sun Dec 11, 2011 9:08 am, edited 5 times in total.
Rule 1: I am always right. Rule 2: If you ever think I am wrong, refer to Rule 1.
The SOURCE of Redwhoopass~ a thousand Red Giant stars, cause everyone knows they're the fuel source for 48% of all Redwhoopass 20% comes from the drugs and voodoo 10% from Pentagrams destroyed by robot unicorns another 20% comes from Red's natural powers and the wookie side of the family and the last 2% is undeterminable, but we suspect it comes from being a chat mod Marshmallow peep souls increase Redwhoopass strength. They are an amplifier or catalyst [/Pleh]
StashinGremlins wrote:I'm not mean, I just say what most people keep in their heads.
Somewhere over the rainbow, Red is high And the tulips that you tripped in Once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow Blue smurfs fly And the trips that you tripped in Trips really do come soon* Sooo oooo oon!
Someday I’ll wish upon a star Wake up where the anons are far behind me Where Anons melt like lemon drops High above the chimney tops that’s where you’ll ***** me oh
Somewhere o-[/watermelon], bluebirds fly And the trip that you dare to, why, oh why can’t I?
Well I see Tevs of green and Red wookies too, Headshots of boom, for me and you And I think to myself What a wonderful Chat
Well I see fonts of blue and I see noobs use white And the brightness of pink I like to sneeze and I think to myself What a wonderful Chat
The colors of the rainbow are so pretty in the sky Are also on the profiles of people passing by I see friends facing palms, Saying, “How stupid are you?” They’re really saying, I…I love you I hear anons cry and I watch them join, They’ll become new members, New ships to be coined. And I think to myself What a wonderful Chat
Someday I’ll wish upon a star Log in where the anons are far behind me Where Anons melt like lemon drops High above the chimney that’s where you’ll ***** me Oh, Somewhere over the rainbow, Red is high And the trip that you dare to, why, oh why can’t I?